Fears

One of the things that I am most afraid of is something horrible happening to my friends or family. I think that comes across as sounding a little cliched and insincere, but it honestly scares me to no end. You hear about car crashes all the time, or plane crashes, or freak accidents, or shootings or or or...
The thing is, it's always someone else's family. It isn't yours. You feel sympathy for them, and you think how horrible that must be, and then you move on, because it doesn't concern you directly.
I cannot even fathom what I would do if something happened to my family or friends. I don't know if I would burst out screaming immediately or if I would just walk around, numb, for awhile. I know that it's pointless and also depressing to think this way, but sometimes I can't help it.
This is kind of embarrassing and cheesy to write, but I actually developed a habit a few years ago where, whenever my parents left the house or I got off the phone with them or I went away from my friends, I would just say "I love you!" constantly. I think it gets on some people's nerves sometimes (and it's primarily a habit at this point instead of a compulsion) but I always just wanted people to know, in case anything happened.

So, yeah. I like people. I don't want to be in that family or one of those friends that people feel sorry for and then forget about.